THE BURGLAR DIARIES

The Burglar Diaries

I love books like this that take you into a world you would never be part of. In this case the world of a career burglar. You ever wonder how breaking and entering works? How doing it day after day, like any other job, would work? Danny King brings you the scoop, the inside view, he pulls back the curtain...and it's pretty entertaining.

King takes us along as he breaks into houses and steals their TVs and VCRs (yes, it's a bit dated, but still you get the idea). For the most part it seems very boring, like most jobs. King would find out about someone leaving town, or knows they will be out of their house on a specific date, and he would plan on breaking in. Him and a fellow burglar (he liked to work as a team) would knock on the door to make sure nobody was home, then usually break into a window around the back. They would look for all the regular items of value (TV, VCR, CDs, etc) and pile them by the door. Then they would load up a van and drive away. In and out in five or ten minutes. Sounds pretty boring eh?

Well just like any other job their are irregular days and events that make things interesting. King takes us through a few of those situations, like when they get caught by a big burly fireman. They try to escape by locking themselves in the bathroom and going out the window. The man catches Danny and gives him a good beating before his partner whacks him with a shovel. Another time his B&A partner has to take a BM...he craps in the bathroom and finds out there is no toilet paper. There are plenty of funny mishaps that happen over the years.

King also gives us some insight into the techniques the pros use to find houses to break into. They sometimes just drive around and look for houses that seem empty. Sometimes they look for a big party and then break into the neighbours house. Usually they have some sort of tip off. It can come from some low life who overheard a conversation to an ex lover who wants to get some sort of revenge on their previous partner.

The characters in this world are a laugh. Most of them are dim witted idiots who eventually end up in jail, but there are also surprisingly clever pros who study the art of break and enter. It's a crazy world out there.

By the end of the book I'm actually liking King, even if he is a life long criminal. He shares some of his life problems, his work problems, his relationship problems...and he seems like a nice guy. He is one of the classier burglars, if that can be a way to describe crime, who try to cause the least amount of damage possible. He doesn't do things like leave the taps running, steal wedding rings, break things just for the fun of it. He treats the robbery like a job and tries to be as professional as possible. Which is kind of endearing...he does use a lot of crude language though, which is hard to read at times. But, other than that, a great book.