UNSEEN ACADEMICALS - TERRY PRATCHETT

Unseen Academicals

- Terry Pratchett -

Another episode of the crazy wizards of the Unseen University taking on something out of their comfort zone. This time, the over eating, sedentary, extra-old, overly-academic, unathletic, gang of magic 'users' take on the old game of football (aka soccer). The jokes come from the difference between the actual game of soccer and the perception of soccer by a non soccer fan...which I'm assuming would describe most readers of Terry Pratchett. 

So, there is this perception that football is more than just the game of kicking a ball around a field. It is all encompassing to some folk, ie where you reside determines what team you like. You support that team no matter what. Then there is the crowd behaviour during a game. I'm thinking of the hooliganism that used to take place. The fighting, the rioting, etc. Pratchett takes this to a new level. Anything to an extreme is funny. So selling pies in a crowd of fighting fans is funny, especially if they are a good deal like 3 for 5 knuts. 

There is another storyline involving a cook from the university and a goblin. This storyline takes up most of the book, and kind of leads nowhere. Which is frustrating and disappointing. One of the few down points I've ever had to read through with Pratchett.

Back to the positives folk. There were plenty of laughs. Plenty of the misinterpretations that cause confusion which leads to humour. The book was not missing any of that. It wasn't overflowing with it either. I wouldn't put this book on Terry's top ten list, or top twenty list, or if there were a top thirty...it wouldn't place on that one either. So, not his best. But a good try nonetheless.  

The best part of this book for me was actually the purchase. I was at a local thrift shop perusing the books as I always do. I happen to look on a shelf I haven't looked at before - the hard cover novels. I know, it sounds funny, but maybe you just had to be there to understand? Anyway, I spotted this book right away and to make the purchase even sweeter was that the book was only $1...and an orange tag. That day orange tag items were 90% off. Therefore, get the calculator out, I only paid 10 cents for the book! It was well worth it.

Terry Pratchett's Unseen Academicals

Book bargain at 90% off

This book hasn't put me off Pratchett and his hilarious Discworld series. The other dozen I've read have been very funny, I think this was a 'one-off'. Even if I don't talk about the actual story I will always have that treasure hunting tale where I found a Terry Pratchett book for 10 cents.

If you would like to buy this book off of me, I'll sell it for $2. It's a great hardcover, wonderful story, and would go great in anybody's collection.

I have a little video review of the book here :

MEN AT ARMS

MEN AT ARMS

(Discworld #15)

- Terry Pratchett -

The Night Watch is changing. Their leader is leaving. They are recruiting on an equal opportunity basis - Dwarves, Trolls, even Women can apply! They are even seriously attempting to solve a crime! What has the Discworld come to?!

What I like about series books is that you get to be re-introduced to beloved characters you met in previous stories. You get another chance to learn and connect with these characters, to gain a better understanding of them, to spend some quality time with them. This could sound like a literary nightmare if you despise these characters, and you are now forced to endure another tale about them. Luckily, I love the City Watch. They are quirky, and funny, and good hearted (well, except for Nobby). In Men at Arms they continue their streak of being quirky, funny, and good hearted (again, except for Nobby), and I thoroughly enjoyed reading about them.

What really stood out for me in this novel was how Cpl Carrot seemed to really come into his own. He was confident, he took charge when needed, and even lied! Well, he didn't actually lie, but, he did manipulate his words to imply something else...that's lying, right? It seemed to me that Carrot is beginning to realize just how much power and influence he really has and starting to use it a bit. He has a heart of gold now, but, will this power tarnish it and send him over to the dark side in the future?

There were also a few new recruits which added to the story. A troll and a dwarf, sworn enemies, have to work together...we know where this is going. They'll argue and bicker, but, when the fighting starts they will have each others back. And, just as a spoiler - one of them dies! Yes, a death! It was a bit surprising. The other new recruit is a woman. Not only a woman, but, a woman with a secret. 

So, to sum it up; a Carrot, a dwarf, a troll, and a woman with a secret. With that description you should be out of your seat running to the bookstore to snatch this one up! I will not stop you.

RATING : READ

LORDS AND LADIES

LORDS AND LADIES

(Discworld #14)

- Terry Pratchett -

As per the author's note - this book builds off of a previous Discworld 'witches' book (Witches Abroad). I believe if you can pick up on the small carry over of Magrat being tentatively engaged to King Verence you have no worries about being lost, other than the usual feelings of being lost when you immerse yourself in Pratchett's Discworld.

The whole love and marriage theme continued through this novel, extending its claws into all of the witches. Nanny Ogg, no surprise (as evidenced by her four or five previous husbands). BUT, even Granny fell prey to love, even if it was just for a few brief moments. And, although it may sound like a cuddly, soft, lovey-dovey tale, it was in fact one of the crudest books to date - b/c along with marriage comes the wedding night! 

I swear, if I read another variant of the naive bride and groom's wedding night...I'll...most likely laugh. However, on top of that (forgive the pun) there are jokes about the unicorn (and the size of his horn), the long man hill, books on marital...er, martial arts, and the culturally insignificant stick and bucket dance (not to be performed in the company of the fairer sex).

Pratchett managed to tie these varied subjects (along with string theory) in with the plot of grinning elves attempting to take over the world. After reading this book you will never look at elves the same again. What's behind that constant grin anyway?

Granny and the girls, along with help from some Wizards (and the Librarian) do end up wiping the smirk off the face of the elves in a very exciting finish. Every then lives happily ever after, or so it seems.

I was actually a bit surprised by the depth of character development in this book. There was the usual one liners and non-sequitur conversations that are light and funny, but, there was also a lot of background brought up about the witches younger life. I especially found Granny's love life history, her decision to become a witch, and her true feeling about Magrat, very revealing and interesting. To me, it really gave her character a lot more depth that was missing from previous books. This character building does mean that every line is not a funny, not some cute play on words, or a pun filled paradox, like most of the other Discworld books have been. However, it did seem a bit more rewarding to read this, number 14, than many of the others before it.

My one complain is not about the writing, but, about technology. I read an ebook format which removed the footnotes from the bottom of the page and filed them away in the back. I guess the idea is that you can push on the footnote number and hyperlink your way back to the footnote. Great idea. Who wants to read the footnotes in a book anyway? Well, I do! Especially in these books! They add an extra layer of humour and sometimes it is the funniest thing on a page! The problem - the hyperlinking doodad did not work on my reader, therefore, I couldn't conveniently read any of the footnotes (until I was finished the book if you want to be technical). On top of that, the battery ran out, it froze, the screen had a layer of jam on it from my kid's sticky fingers playing with 'Daddy's Toy' which they know not to touch, and the formatting of the breaks made reading conversations hard...and this is the future of books? I love technology.

RATING : READ

SMALL GODS

SMALL GODS

(Discworld #13)

- Terry Pratchett -

Another wonderful Discworld novel. One of the many Pratchett books that is full of funny from front to back. Terry's writing is bang on with Small Gods; endless one liners, hard hitting (hence, hilarious) satire, and a cast of comedic characters...'onna stick' anyone?

As with other Discworld novels, it's not the actual plot that makes this a book you want to tell your friends about (provided they have a similar sense of humour, mind you), it's the rest. The actual plot involves Brutha having his religion challenged by a small God named Om. Om is a tortoise with one follower -  Brutha. But, the journey (a very mocking journey) through a strict religious order, over the desert, around some philosophers, and back is (as it sounds) very entertaining. It's one of those situation where you take a step back, remove yourself emotionally, and take out that 'critical-eye' magnifying glass you ordered on amazon...and laugh at the absurd way religion, philosophy, and democracy run themselves...add in the 'onna stick' street vendor and you've got some good laughs.

Call your Gods and tell them to tell their followers to read this book.

RATING : READ

WITCHES ABROAD

WITCHES ABROAD

(Discworld #12)

- Terry Pratchett -

Those laughable Witches (Granny, Nanny, & Magrat) are back in another argumentative novel. Doesn't it seem like they are always arguing? Well, the battle of wills continues. Granny, aggressive. Nanny, passive aggressive. Magrat, confused aggressive. They all have such different personalities that it makes for great dialogue, which is the highlight (and bulk) of the book. Pratchett's strength is, no doubt about it, his ability to bring characters to life through their chitter chatter. He somehow manages to fill almost every sentence said with a joke. You can't help but chuckle when reading. I found Witches Abroad to one of the funniest books so far. Pratchett was really on his game when he wrote this one.

The overall story is pretty humorous, a parody of fairy tales. One of the witches inherits a fairy godmother wand and is supposed to fulfill a Cinderella type story (A maid marries a prince deal). Well, not all of the witches agree that this should happen (hence, the constant arguing). They all hop on their brooms and take a journey to a far away kingdom. From that point on the witches come across many (funny) takes on classic fairy tales. They do eventually end up saving a misguided kingdom and playing the role of fairy godmother, but, as you should expect from Pratchett, not in any normal way, shape, or form.

The ending left me with a couple of questions. Will Lily be part of future books? Will we see more Greebo (I sure hope so)?

RATING: READ

GUARDS! GUARDS!

GUARDS! GUARDS!

- Terry Pratchett -

We get to meet the Night Watch in this 8th Discworld novel by Pratchett. You gotta love a ragtag bunch of losers who have no recognizable talents and put no effort into their jobs whatsoever, yet, somehow seem to come out on top. This is the kind of situations that bring out the best in a character...or at least makes them memorable. Carrot, Knobbly (sic), Colon, and the other guy are now etched into that happy spot in my brain.

This toasty offering is just bubbling with laughs. Not only do we have the incompetent Night Watch, but there is a Crazy cat lady...er, Crazy dragon lady, a hilarious bunch of argumentative 'brothers', an angry librarian ape, and a dragon in heat. Image the story you can forge with all those characters.

I rank it up there as one of the better Discworlds I have read so far. 

Funny, as with some of the previous Discworld novels, I can barely recall the actual story line(s). What I vividly recall is a patchwork of funny scenes or one of the hilarious discussions/arguments. The book leaves me with more of a feeling than a distinct memory. A good, funny, happy feeling. Strange...

RATING: READ

P.S. Think Carrot top.

PYRAMIDS

PYRAMIDS

- Terry Pratchett -

The strange, mystic, and ancient powers of the pyramids are examined in this book. Through the lives of a king, an assassin, and a concubine, a tale is built that rises to a peak, as pyramids do, with the help of You Bastard (the camel who spits with pinpoint accuracy at moving targets).

Watch your backs seagulls!

Pratchett even manages to bring in the concept of pi, yet, it has slipped my mind what kind. Blueberry? Bumbleberry?

If concubine and bumbleberry were not big enough hints, this book was another blithesome work of literature by the always funny TP (for short). Another parody of a genuine scientifical myth - this time the pyramids, egypt-ology, and mummies - done up with a bow (oversized and polka dotted, Pratchett style).

However, for me at least, this book had an almost 'grown up' feel to it. The two or three different story lines starting miles apart come together at a peak. Which I found to be a slightly different style of writing than some of the previous discworlds. It felt more, mature? I also found this with the characters. They were not as extreme and memorable, they were almost inching towards middle aged and grounded. No Cohen the barbarian, no Rincewind, no Flowerface (or whatever that tourist's name was).

I'd say read this book if you are going through the Discworld series because the camel is well worth it. But, if you plan on reading just one Discworld book in your life, there are better ones.

RATING: READ

Bookclub Questions:

1) Teppic - Strong enough to be the 'main' character?

2) Share a seagull story

3) The assassins claim to be good for society and mankind. Can you think of other comparable occupations that claim to be good for society?

WYRD SISTERS

WYRD SISTERS

- Terry Pratchett -

Another tale full of magic and humour in that wonderful land of Discworld.

The magic is supplied by three witches, who gripe, groan, insult, cast spells, talk jibberish, and eventually save a kingdon. They eat apples and fly 'beater' broomsticks that would not pass any sort of environmental emission control test nowadays. They even manage to fast forward time for fifteen years...which from my previous 'research' into Star Trek books completely bypasses any logic with regard to space time continuum...anyway, nerd cap off...there is even garden gnome jokes. What more could you ask for? It was another wonderful read in the Discworld series.

For a light hearted humorous book I have to admit I was surprised that I had to go and find a dictionary. We all know this Pratchett fellow can turn a phrase, and now I'm coming to realize find the absolute perfect word to describe something...even words I don't quite know the meaning of. So not only did I have a few laughs but I expanded my vocabulary. Here is the list of words I looked up; what I thought they meant and the real meanings...

Gregarious - does not mean flamboyant or gaudy dress as I thought. It means a group or being social.

Moorland - is not a place in spain. It is just a general term for hard scrubland.

Heather - is not just a name for a girl. It refers to bushes found on the moorland (see above).

Impetuous - does not mean being rude. It means vehement...which sent me on another trip through the dictionary. It ends up meaning violent or intense.

RATING: READ

MORT

MORT

-Terry Pratchett-

Mort is a simple country bumpkin who has reached the age where he should find a career. Lucky for him he is chosen for an apprenticeship. Unfortunately, it's with Death.

Without saying, this book is full of dark humour, mostly surrounding Death. It's a light hearted, yet deep view, of Death's job. About how Death feels about his job. About how Death has a mid life career crisis and goes off looking for something different. There are a few side stories, the apprentice learning the ropes of the death trade, Death's daughter falling in love with the new apprentice, and a strangely non comical story about destiny.

I really enjoyed the idea of Death getting sick of going out night after night collecting souls and wanting to try something new. I could relate to Death's job search and his lack of 'real skills' forcing him into a job flipping burgers. It's actually kind of scary being able to relate to Death!?

Pratchett's writing was again brimming with humour, he really knows how to turn a phrase, a paragraph, a page, a chapter, two chapters...it's funny is what I mean to say.

I also thought this book had a bit more substance than the previous ones I've read, like there was a point in it. That point : you can't screw with destiny. When you are going to die, you are going to die, you cannot change that. You just have to accept it and move on, or reincarnate, or something?

If you have enjoyed other Pratchett books, you'll enjoy this one.

RATING: READ

THE LIGHT FANTASTIC

THE LIGHT FANTASTIC

- Terry Pratchett -

The Light Fantastic is the second side-splitting book in the Discworld Series. Now, you may all know that the old proverb, 'sequels suck'...I believe it's Latin. Personally, I've run across a few sequels that have indeed 'sucked'. But, mirroring the many ideas and themes in these Discworld (where a theory, in this case sequels suck, is turn on its ear), The Light Fantastic was, well, for lack of a more descriptive and imaginative word - Fantastic! It made you think, then laugh, then try and look at someone's right ear*...not in an insane way either.
*inside joke if you haven't read the book and think this phrase is right out of left field.

If you think back to the first book in this Discworld series, The Colour of Magic. You will recall that it ended with Rincewind falling off the flat edge of the world. Well, I'll let you know it all worked itself out. Rincewind is fine, escapes Death for the umpteenth time, as per usual. The story in this book continues on as they travel around the Disc discovering more strange places, strange people, or murderous mobs (which Pratchett, of course, makes hilarious). Again, almost every single sentence in this book is an unwasted chance for a joke. And, the variety of humour keeps the writing fresh and lively (like a rocket leaf salad with toasted pine nuts - or something similar? Ok, I plagiarized this from a Jaimie Oliver book) with intellectual science based humour to dumbed down pie in the face (or baseball in the groin) slapstick.
Damn, I just tried to outdo Pratchett with an extremely long sentence and made it nowhere near his record. I noticed a very long sentence in this book that was six lines long. What's more, it sounded grammatically sound (for lack of a better adjective). Literary Wizard, Master, Aes Sedai is all I have to say.

All I have to say on that one random point. Back to the novel. I found this book more enjoyable than the first book and I'm not sure exactly why. Perhaps I liked the new characters; Cohen the Barbarian, the Trolls, Herrena (the would be secretary turned swordswoman). Or, perhaps I've grown fond of Rincewind, Twoflowers, and that beloved Luggage. I do know if felt like there was more of a point to the story - with the death star coming and Rincewind's destiny/fate coming to light. Now, if he had only found his father...it was almost Star Wars in structure (take that however you want to).
I have to point out one specific character, Trymon. He really hit a nerve with me. He is the embodiment of all things I despise in the corporate world. After the first few encounters with his character, I laughed, then though...really nasty thoughts, like I want to pummel this guy, throw him down the stairs, and possible watch him explode. *spoiler alert* My dreams come true.

Rating: READ

THE COLOUR OF MAGIC

The Colour Of Magic

- Terry Pratchett -

Irrelevant, illogical, borderline insane.

Yet, imaginative, inventive, and irresistible.

This book has it all, or at least most. There are characters that are out of this world, literally. The world is out of this world, literally. And, the plot is so faint it doesn’t get in the way, however, it does gently glide the story along like a gentle summer breeze.

This is the first book in the well known Discworld series. Discworld is a made up land where almost anything goes. The laws of time, space, and sometimes gravity do not apply. There is magic, magical creatures, magical luggage…overall, all things magic. This land is completely unbelievable and you will need to let go of reality to even have a chance at enjoying this book. But, that’s the point I think? You don’t run across many adult books where the imagination is free to roam, but, you do here.

Trying to explain what happens in this novel will make anyone sound a bit crazy. I’ll give it good try though. There is a cowardly unwizard (never graduated wizard school) who runs across this tourist with a magic luggage chest. They end up burning down the town, destroying a giant one eyed monster, falling off the edge of the earth…in a ‘spaceship’. All the while being followed by the tourist’s luggage, by Death himself, and Fate (who is in competition with Lady Destiny). Crazy? No, in fact it’s a highly intelligent satire. Including some thinly veiled comparisons between deadly magic and nuclear radiation. I believe there is a lot more than I could comprehend on my first pass through.

I found the book a slow read, but I mean this in the very best way possible. Pratchett makes every word count, so I took my time savouring every phrase, every metaphor, every syllable! You really have to read it to know what I mean.Apparently these Disworld books are so popular there have been many more published. They seem to have a bit of a cult following.

Conclusion: It must be good.

I thought it was good, not mind-blowing mind you. But, partway between Great and Good. Good+ if it were a grade.

RATING : READ